Today, after the LC-meeting, I got to keep the LCP-key for the office.
Wow.
This was the last LC-meeting for Safa and her team. Next LC-meeting is our.
Yes, I am scared. It feels wonderful.
The last weeks it has just been accelerating. The work, the responsabilities. I remember for two weeks ago being frustrated for not getting enoguh responsability. For not being busy enough.
I should just had shut up and enjoy the vacantions...
I feel I am starting to getting warm, to start thinking in different ways.. As an LCP, maybe? Maybe. There is so much to do, and so many things on my mind.
And I am not acting sustainibly. I am not getting balance in my life. I am very unmotivated when it comes to my studies. And AIESEC-stuff ARE so much funnier, really. Oh well... So I am not leading by example, not living according to my (and AIESEC's) values. But I am working on that, I am!
Oh yeah, and I have experienced some frustration within the communication field. Oh my, it's goin to be a challenge this year.
LOL.
What wont?
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
To be or not to be
a bitch.
Yes my dear colleague, this is all for you and about what you told me the other day. I didn't have the chance to tell you how much I recognised myself in what you said. This about being a bitch.
I think one of the hardest part of all this, for me at least, is going to be about daring to make people dislike you a bit, at least for the moment. I always want all people to like me. Who doesn't want that? But as a leader, you sometimes have to be that bitch beacuse there will be moments when there is no way out. When you have to be clear with disappointments and unapprovals. When you have to communicate bad stuff. I know times like that will come, and I've been warned: It will be hard. People will hate you. For a bit. Til they understand your reasons for acting a certain way.
An incident in my leadership team recently gave me a bit of a taste of how it is going to be later. Just a little bit, just a smaller incident. But that was enough to feel it is going to be hard to hard.
Really hard. But I'll learn. That's what they say. I will have to act as a bitch some days. But people might not stop liking me because of that!
But I'll learn...
I'll learn so many things this year, can hardly wait.
;-)
Yes my dear colleague, this is all for you and about what you told me the other day. I didn't have the chance to tell you how much I recognised myself in what you said. This about being a bitch.
I think one of the hardest part of all this, for me at least, is going to be about daring to make people dislike you a bit, at least for the moment. I always want all people to like me. Who doesn't want that? But as a leader, you sometimes have to be that bitch beacuse there will be moments when there is no way out. When you have to be clear with disappointments and unapprovals. When you have to communicate bad stuff. I know times like that will come, and I've been warned: It will be hard. People will hate you. For a bit. Til they understand your reasons for acting a certain way.
An incident in my leadership team recently gave me a bit of a taste of how it is going to be later. Just a little bit, just a smaller incident. But that was enough to feel it is going to be hard to hard.
Really hard. But I'll learn. That's what they say. I will have to act as a bitch some days. But people might not stop liking me because of that!
But I'll learn...
I'll learn so many things this year, can hardly wait.
;-)
Thursday, April 17, 2008
After elections
I have a whole EB!
yay!
And three great PMs!
wihhuu!
I held the elections, kind of chairing it. I made a lousy presentation and acted a bit confused I think. But well, I have got another year to practise til next time I have to hold eletions again.
This last weeks I have been facing myself and my ghosts and my issues a lot. So what I was told about, it has already started. Last night was one of the moments I had to face myself. I know it wasn't the last one.
Not by far.
And I'm thinking too much maybe. I got the advise yesterday: Don't think too much.
So all my issues, what about them? I am suppose to share here, I know.... And I will.
To be continued..
yay!
And three great PMs!
wihhuu!
I held the elections, kind of chairing it. I made a lousy presentation and acted a bit confused I think. But well, I have got another year to practise til next time I have to hold eletions again.
This last weeks I have been facing myself and my ghosts and my issues a lot. So what I was told about, it has already started. Last night was one of the moments I had to face myself. I know it wasn't the last one.
Not by far.
And I'm thinking too much maybe. I got the advise yesterday: Don't think too much.
So all my issues, what about them? I am suppose to share here, I know.... And I will.
To be continued..
Friday, April 11, 2008
There are reasons
I was reminded about something important today. There are reasons to why the person on this position is me and not someone else. There are reasons, and at first I couldn't come up with any... But of course there are some...
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
Home from transition-meeting
Always surprised by how fast 4 hours can just past by. Safa has so much to share, all our talkings have felt great (I am so glad I have her). For every time I feel more secure and confident. Yes, there will be challenges but I will overcome them.
Among a lot of other things, we spoke about bonding in the team, how to do that in mine I don't know. I need to get to know the individuals in it first, what their needs are in this subject. We also spoke about how great it is to have good contact with the others in the LCP-team, to share things with them and that it should be a giving-taking-relationship. Inputs from others are crucial, I get that. I will be first in line to share things, I just need to get to know the others a bit first.
Tomorrow I will hold some of the LC-meeting. I am preparing for it now. Exciting!
:-)
I shared Valborg- preparation with my EB-elects. I mailed them today. No response! Gah! Ok, it wasn't any important but still. I better do it myself, then.
Our interns are fine, and that is great. They will come to the LC-meeting tomorrow!
LCPeace to you all!
;)
Among a lot of other things, we spoke about bonding in the team, how to do that in mine I don't know. I need to get to know the individuals in it first, what their needs are in this subject. We also spoke about how great it is to have good contact with the others in the LCP-team, to share things with them and that it should be a giving-taking-relationship. Inputs from others are crucial, I get that. I will be first in line to share things, I just need to get to know the others a bit first.
Tomorrow I will hold some of the LC-meeting. I am preparing for it now. Exciting!
:-)
I shared Valborg- preparation with my EB-elects. I mailed them today. No response! Gah! Ok, it wasn't any important but still. I better do it myself, then.
Our interns are fine, and that is great. They will come to the LC-meeting tomorrow!
LCPeace to you all!
;)
Three photos
5 generations of LCPs:
2008/2009 Gabi
2007/2008 Safa
2006/2007 Martina
2005/2006 Joanna
2004/2005 Emma
My dear LC!! (thanks simon for the pic!)
Me and the other LCP elects of Sweden
Saturday, April 5, 2008
National Conference, the last weekend, it took me almost three days to fully recover from it.
It was my first conference as LCPe, and as such I had more responsability, I was chief of the Uppsala delegation and had to make sure everyone were ok and kept the spririt up. This last thing was the easiest one I think, Uppsala have no problems with the spririt as I see it... :) My LC is wonderful! We got like 4 awards at the Official Dinner.
I experienced some harder moments, when I sometimes got frustrated or disappointed by myself when I didn't behave as the person and/or the leader I wanted to be. It is frustrating not beeing perfect.. ;-). I have so much to work on, and it was good to notice it this conference when I wasn't really alone yet but I had Safa there. Next conference I will be totally on my own.
I experienced that many more people "saw" me now, that I was more watched and I think that was true and totally logical. It's just something I'll have to get used to. This is totally connected with behaving as a role model 24/7, at conferences as least.
Another thing I felt, is lonelyness. Not for long but I felt it. I didn't know whom to turn to, when I was feeling all negative and all just... tired. This time I called an "external", a non-aiesec friend, we had a talk and then I was fit for fight again. But later that very day I realized in that I am not at all alone, that there are people to turn to. But it took me that bus ride to feel that.
It was cool meeting the other newly elected LCPs! They all feel like nice, cool people, can't wait to get to now them better! And even COOLER was it to meet my past 4 generations of LCPs of Uppsala. There were all there, at the same party! And they are all competent and great women. It felt mangificent to be around them, and a tremendous honor to get the chance to be the next in line. What a great legacy! I will not turn you down, guys, I will do my best. All of them had won either the "LC of the year"-award or "Excellence in leadership"-award.
So, in whole, the conference was great. It gave me some things to think about, I had some good learning points and I got strengthened by the appreciation I got and by the things that I did good, and also of course by my lovely LC... I feel a lot more secure about this. It's going to be great, and I'll do great because I'll put all my heart in it. Now, I am just waiting to start working, to get my whole team and to receive all knowledge I can get from Safa.
This weekend is very speciall to us here in my LC. This weekend our EPs finally arrived! We are all very excited!
It was my first conference as LCPe, and as such I had more responsability, I was chief of the Uppsala delegation and had to make sure everyone were ok and kept the spririt up. This last thing was the easiest one I think, Uppsala have no problems with the spririt as I see it... :) My LC is wonderful! We got like 4 awards at the Official Dinner.
I experienced some harder moments, when I sometimes got frustrated or disappointed by myself when I didn't behave as the person and/or the leader I wanted to be. It is frustrating not beeing perfect.. ;-). I have so much to work on, and it was good to notice it this conference when I wasn't really alone yet but I had Safa there. Next conference I will be totally on my own.
I experienced that many more people "saw" me now, that I was more watched and I think that was true and totally logical. It's just something I'll have to get used to. This is totally connected with behaving as a role model 24/7, at conferences as least.
Another thing I felt, is lonelyness. Not for long but I felt it. I didn't know whom to turn to, when I was feeling all negative and all just... tired. This time I called an "external", a non-aiesec friend, we had a talk and then I was fit for fight again. But later that very day I realized in that I am not at all alone, that there are people to turn to. But it took me that bus ride to feel that.
It was cool meeting the other newly elected LCPs! They all feel like nice, cool people, can't wait to get to now them better! And even COOLER was it to meet my past 4 generations of LCPs of Uppsala. There were all there, at the same party! And they are all competent and great women. It felt mangificent to be around them, and a tremendous honor to get the chance to be the next in line. What a great legacy! I will not turn you down, guys, I will do my best. All of them had won either the "LC of the year"-award or "Excellence in leadership"-award.
So, in whole, the conference was great. It gave me some things to think about, I had some good learning points and I got strengthened by the appreciation I got and by the things that I did good, and also of course by my lovely LC... I feel a lot more secure about this. It's going to be great, and I'll do great because I'll put all my heart in it. Now, I am just waiting to start working, to get my whole team and to receive all knowledge I can get from Safa.
This weekend is very speciall to us here in my LC. This weekend our EPs finally arrived! We are all very excited!
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